time machine
the same qns keep popping in my mind recently. If am given a time machine to turn back time, what will do with it?
I gave a serious thought about this...
whenever you ask people, some of them might say no matter what in the end we will take same path with the same decision because at least for the decision they made this far they are happy about it. To me, if i was given a time machine. i would rather forego the happiness all these while and choose another path decision. because at least without those happiness, we won't end up this kind of misery. but then too bad, time machine never takes place and we have to face the reality for the whole choices we make in life.
life is always a lil cranky, the ups and downs we come across. and when you're down you will always thimk about the worst things in life. but when you're facing the ups, we always take it for granted. And that's why people alway says that happines is always short and misery always last forever. human spend too much time dwelling in unhappines and that's why misery last forever and not happiness.
As birthday is just around the corner, people will start asking what i want for a birthday. There isn't antyhing in material that i would purposely ask for. what am hoping for is just a pure happiness, a simple happiness that comes within me. a simple happiness that will make me smile without too much trouble. as we grow up, those most simple happines seems so much harder to achieve. those jian dan de xin fu, li wo men yue lai yue yuan.
is that simplest happiness too much to ask for?
i hope this birthday will bring me the slightest happiness over th past few years. At least not spending that past midnight at seletar again like last year. That's definitely something i have yet to get over. its been a tough journey since i turned 20s', everything never seems to be smooth for me. and i really hope this coming bday will be turning point. a point where i can get the slighest happiness.
i see myself recovering from all the sadness. i've to admit time heals and time helps alot. looking back at myself, i might be the one who i used to be but at least some changes take place. this is a good lesson for me, even if i have to pay a big price for it. it worthwhile after all, a good lesson for me know how it should be handle in the first place.
i learnt that i take responsibility of my own life. and i shuldn't blame anyone for putting me thrgh wat i been thrgh. after all its a test in life. what doesn't kill me should make me stronger. so i believe am stronger now.
there are so much things that worht learning, maybe sometime putting down that worthless pride can gain lots more than. at least something more enriching, something that worth to keep. something that worht to be remember deep inside me.
i fallen, i paid a price for it. i stand up and i learn a lesson. a lesson that worthwhile that make me look at life at a wider perspective. a macro view of the whole world and the people...
these few mths, am leanring to be who i used to be. the trendy that you used to know. the rational side of me that was lost and found.
i had always been here. if you din realize.
what we could have been, 26.5.08.